Surviving the Holidays
Paul • 10 December 2025
Getting through the emotional turmoil that holidays bring
Christmas alone?
Hanukah with the homophobes?
Kwanzaa with people who judge you?
New Years separated from your loved ones?
As we move into the holiday season, many people find this time more emotionally demanding than expected. Even when things look festive on the outside, what’s happening inside can be very different — stress, pressure, loneliness, old family dynamics, or complicated feelings can all surface. If this season feels heavy or overwhelming, please know you’re not alone.
To help you stay grounded, here are a few simple practices from our counsellor, Paul, which you may find find supportive:
Keep things manageable
Give yourself permission to reduce pressure and expectations and do what YOU want. You don’t need to do everything, attend everything, or feel a certain way. Choosing what truly matters to you, and gently letting go of what doesn’t, can dramatically reduce stress.
Allow your emotions to exist
Tough feelings don’t mean you’re doing something wrong. They are valid responses to a demanding time of year, and they are telling you something. Try to name what you're feeling (“I’m tired,” “I feel disconnected,” “I’m anxious about X”). Naming emotions often softens their intensity.
Create small moments to breathe
Even 1–2 minutes of slow breathing can help your nervous system settle. A simple practice: breathe in for 4 seconds, out for 6. Repeat a few times. It signals safety and reduces overwhelm.
Reach out when you need support
Whether it’s a friend, a safe person, or one of us at Consciously Kinky, staying connected can make a big difference. A message, a brief check-in, or a shared moment of honesty, or simply unpacking what is going on in our minds can ease feelings of isolation.
Don’t forget, we also offer WhatsApp counselling, so even when you’re at home with your parents and paper thin walls, we can help.
Set boundaries where needed
If certain situations, conversations, or people drain you, it’s okay to step back, excuse yourself, or limit time spent there. Boundaries protect your energy, not your distance from others.
At Consciously Kinky, both of us (Matthew and Paul) are here if you need a caring, non-judgemental space during this period. Whether it’s emotional support, a listening ear, or some grounding guidance, you’re welcome to reach out.
All parts of your life — identity, desires, struggles, and hopes — are embraced here without judgement. We’re fully kink-aware and LGBTQ+ affirming.
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